Where Can You Find Love?

Posted: February 24, 2013 in Love
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Photo courtesy: Google images

Photo courtesy: Google images

Love is a beautiful thing. And anything beautiful is very much fragile. A beautiful painting can be stained by oil, a beautiful face can be mired by a knife, and a beautiful landscape can be denuded by a strong torrential rain. The list can go endless. Nature or man takes toil of time to form them but such a short time to rescind them. And because forming them into almost perfect takes great amounts of time, searching them is equally hard as well.

Whether you agree or not, all of us are in a deep quest. We are in a constant search for love. People have gone through great lengths to acquire it. It took them to unknown places. It pushed them to do things they have not done since. It brought them both heartaches and joys. It led them to do the sacrificial deed of giving and the humbling act of receiving.

So, where can you find love?

Actually, I think the better question is to whom can I find love?

I would like you all to realize that the search for love takes stages. It is in these stages where you realize what you really want. It is in these stages where your definition of love is defined not by your great logical and intellectual prowess but by the knowledge of experience. You have to know it; otherwise you will be in a constant search of nothing specific.

Falling in love is easy. A lot of times it happens in the most unexpected places, unwelcomed events at the most unordinary circumstances. It can happen at the most unthinkable pair. Nonetheless, it is when the first gush of that ticklish feeling we feel inside that subsides can we only test how sturdy have we really grown in love. Life’s choices, daily pressures and occasional delays intervene and complicate relationships. Our ability to forgive and kind heart to accept differences is what really keeps the passion of love continually burning. If the fire burns dimmer, the decision to rekindle the fire of romance is always in our hands. If none of the couple is willing to make a move, then the pedestal of love they took time to build is in danger to crumble into ugly wasted pieces.

Alright! So, to whom can I really find that love?

I would venture out to say that you need not to look far and wide. You just have to find that person who shares the same view and definition of love such as yours. If you are both convinced of your definition of love, then it is easy to communicate, easy to avoid what the other doesn’t like and easy to compromise.

But! …. By what definition? I’ll share you a secret.

The reason why most people fail in love is that they treat love as a feeling. Oh! You say, wait a minute. Isn’t love a feeling?

Yes sure, love is a feeling but that is only a part of it. Love is itself a decision. To reduce love as a mere emotion is the shallowest knowledge of this heavenly gift. In order to truly understand love, one must learn it from its great author.

Let me explain.

When Jesus commanded us to love our neighbors as much as we love ourselves, it actually demands an inner conviction to obey it. Doing it means you do not wait until you feel like doing it but pulling every fiber of human will to do it even when it doesn’t feel right and doesn’t seem fair. Think of it. Can you really love a neighbor that spreads gossip about you? Of course not. Did you think Jesus doesn’t know how difficult that is for humans? Yet, Jesus called for that hard decision.

For instance, when your girlfriend ask you to buy something in the grocery even if you know there will be a tedious line in the counter during peak hours or your boyfriend ask you to drop him off his office even if you have to take a u-turn is a heavy metropolitan traffic, you just humbly decide to acquiesce. You decide to do it not because you fear threat or someone in authority but because you are compelled to decide out from the abundance of your love. When you wake up in bed early in the morning noticing your partner’s morning breath, you may be discouraged but that shouldn’t be enough for you to raise your white banner and say, “I quit.”

In other words, love is a decision. You have to make that decision every day. That is the only way you can renew your commitment. To be able to love you must decide to love and to be in love. And to preserve a relationship, you must remind yourself to decide each day that you love your partner like the first day you first laid eyes on him or her.

That my friend is the key.

If you are among those who either search for it or wait for it patiently, then look for that person who you know has the gut to plump and remain unswerving in that decision.

Look for that person who can decide to accept your physical imperfections, who decides to keep the love even if you have gained a few pounds.

Look for that person who doesn’t need to argue who’s bottom or who’s top but takes both the intimate pleasure of giving as much an the pain of receiving.

Look for that person who would venture to cook for you even if he doesn’t know how to turn-on the stove.

Look for that person who can decide to accept you even if you can’t afford to take him to an extravagant date and buy him fancy stuff.

Look for that person who in the midst of your embarrassment can lovingly press your hand to say he cares.

Look for that person who decides to be your strengths when your life is a mess.

Or that person who can still embrace you with all comfort and joy after your feisty tantrums and occasional mood swings.

After all, we all want to be with the arms of someone whom we can trust and love us without contempt.

Good Luck and Happy Searching. 

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